Extrications

“Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it.”
Buddha

Come morning I rose early to speak with Pei. I met him with some blackwwine and asked if he had an ehn or two to talk. I hadn't gone to tell him how I think his decisions should go but to simply tell him how I felt about a particuar warrior. It wasn't that much of a surprise. He was an observant man, he had seen a new face among Grandmother's fires and had figured he might have a few motives for being there.

All that I wanted to tell him was that I had grown to care for Ayguili, that he held my heart in his and his had become part of my own. He asked if I was sure of this, did the warrior have these same feelings as well. Yes, it was my understanding from the conversations we have had that what we felt was genuine although untested by any trials. Did I need it to be tested, he wanted to know. Did I need proof? Did Ayguili need reassurance of what we felt, if so then perhaps we needed to wait. I had to smile. We had no insecurities of what we shared. I loved him. He loved me. He nodded though it was easy to see there was still a great deal of thought going on inside the man.

He asked me of my responsibilities to family and all that I could tell him was that I did not have any intentions of relinquishing my love nor care for Grandmother, Mother, my brother or my cousins. I was merely adding Ayguili and his family to them. It was a lot of family to add and we both knew it. Cana's son Another One might come and help Grandmother with the verr though it had not been discussed with everyone involved yet. He thought that was a sound enough idea. It would mean she was not alone and might be good for the boy too.

The topic did come up of being Ayguili's mate and all that I would inherit of that position. It felt good to have someone with a level head to talk to about the apprehensions and the concerns that brought. "Be yourself, Mezoo. Hold to what Uncle Pacu and Aunt Astar have taught you ... to what Grandmother and the verr have spoken." It was the third time I had heard the same words and time to take them to heart. All that I could tell him was that I would try my best. It was what I had promised each of those that had offered the same advice.

The rest would be a matter between men. I trusted that my feelings mattered to him regardless of his decision. At least he had them to base it all on when it came time.

I was thinking as I walked back to the main fires that this trek between the inner fires and the outer ones was one I wanted to keep well traveled. There was much to see to ahead but I had no will nor want to leave anything behind.

The rest of my day would be filled with going through a few of the store wagons Ayguili had. I already knew of a few provisions people were low on and hoped to see they had what they needed. If added what we had to what they had then perhaps there would be enough split or to trade for bulk with the wagons of Tarra's sister.

The division would benefit all.