And it is time for everyone to prepare ...

Take me if you need me
But never hold me down
You're asking me to trust you
Well there's little of that around
I'm trying to believe you
And I'm learning all the time
Two-part personality
The flower and the vine
Stevie Nicks

Where does the actuality of life begin and end? Is it in the wisp of air that fills the lungs .. a breath? If this is so then a child does not live until he has breached the barrier of his mother's womb to inhale the preciousness of existence. But it moves within the safety of its protective cocoon long before those moments. Is it in the movement of the body, to extend and contract muscles and sinew in motion? Many of the returning warriors from battle have been left without arm and leg for ability to navigate their own but there is seen within the eyes the flickering of understanding, in the pleading silence for their plight. Is it then in the reasoning process of thought .. I think .. therefore I am?

"How is Cana? What more can we do for her?"

The vigil had been ongoing around the span of the sun's sleep and wake for two and a half passage hands. Not a moment went by that someone was not in attendance of her needs. I had watched as Tarra had driven herself to be there day and night until she was sometimes dragged to eat and find some rest. The children if not with myself or Birmmah would be found with her among her wagons. Even among my clan a web of safety had been woven over the sons and daughters of Ba'atar and Cana, a blanket of strength spread lovingly over those we could not let go.

We held our breath .. waiting. We had been for a long time now.

I don't think we had looked at the reality of the Ubara's condition through eyes of the everyday world. We saw her laying there like a sleeping statue .. pristine, beautifully serene. Our hope had misted our visions to what was happening right there in front of us.

Ayguili and I had taken our turn at this vigil, standing watch through the eve so that Rook could wash up and the girls could see that he managed to eat. The man had been her gatekeeper tirelessly. Ongel, the healer came to check on his patient. He had been caring for her body, the part she had left behind in our hands painstakingly to make sure it remained healthy for her return.

She would return .. She would return .. she would. The mantra was our own shield to give us strength to be there for her.

It would be the physician that held our rapt attention as he explained the latest prognosis. There had been no change in her condition. His orders had been that her diet be changed. Her body no longer able to process solid foods could be tortured by the digestion as well as a fight in the elimination of wastes. Any hint of soiling could bring infections we did not have the means to treat. The body is very delicate when one cannot tend to it themselves. Like a newborn babe. Movement itself must be done for her to preserve the condition of the muscles and the circulation of blood to keep her limbs alive. The difficulty in conveying to us the seriousness was far too evident in his eyes. When she could no longer swallow then it was time to stop feeding her and its time for everyone to prepare.

There was no mystery to the meaning of his words. They were completely understandable to me. She had shown no signs of waking and Cana herself had planned for the eventuality. It was why she had made arrangements for her children, had made a promise to me to meet me at the Canyon of Echoes ... to return from the other side there.

Ayguili did not seem to be able to accept what he was hearing. Prepare? He began sputtering about Rook having said it was like she was not there, was that what Ongel saw too? That wasn't answered immediately. Instead the healer brought up the positives. Her reflexes were still good. He had seen people lock themselves away for a season and come back. I was pondering how close we were to that now. Somehow I felt the emotion deeper inside him say, that they die shortly after but he never gave it voice.

"That is what I see .. a body with no soul."

As hard as it was to admit I felt as the healer did.

The Ubar never looked up from his stare into the bottom of his bowl of wine. His words were thick with emotion, he wished Ongel had known her, known what a strong woman she was. It pleased me to hear such viable defense for my friend ... is ... He believed Ayguili should have said he could not wait until Ongel met her .. to see what kind of woman she is .. how strong. Present Tense. I could only back that up by confiding she is an amazing woman to many among the harigga.

Sometimes I talk to her and tell her of the children's day when I can. I didn't think she heard me though. Ongel said that was good, but to remember to keep all stories positive. She might only be locked in there. If we tell her the children miss her too much, it could cause stress.

Ayguili wanted to know if that was what locked her in there, inside her body without escape? It could be, we were told, stress makes a body weak. The physician pressed for information of what might have incurred this trauma. It was then we divulged that she had been having dreams, terrible dreams .. terrifying nightmares before she no longer awakened from them. He was sure anxiety from stress might have brought this on. Emotions will do that.

"Let us hope, she returns soon. The body can only last so long like this. No matter how much we care for her, liquids are not enough to sustain for a lifetime. You are prepared in case she awaken, she might not be herself, right? Strange things happen when one is lost in a coma, but sometimes, they are not the same person ... Not to say she won't return the same, sometimes they need extra help getting back that way."

The Ubar was quick to speak up. We will be here for her. We will do what it takes, she will be protected.

An admiration began to set in for Ongel as he soothed some of my warrior's fears with quiet spoken wisdom. Its the will of the Sky as to why these things have happened. We just respect it, and work with what the Sky feels we are strong enough to deal with.

I thanked him for his dedication to the care of my friend. I thanked him for the reminder that there was hope as well as the favor of the sky to turn to. But lets worry about now. I think I knew these things somewhere in my mind but wasn't .. wasn't allowing myself to think of it. She is well loved and as Ayguili said, she will be taken care of. A Haruspex in a special field has been called. The Ubar added that the Haruspex was said to be able to walk in the land of dreams. That was where Cana was believed to be. It is a place I am not familiar ... if she were merely trapped inside her own mind, it would have been my forte. I cannot enter that realm except with express invitation or explicit directive. It is a violation of will and I had been given neither. But dreams ... that is an altogether different place.

The last thing the physician said before he left was that if its told that her spirit is gone, we will know to allow the body to go also.

I was genuinely pleased to see the elder Kamchak as he approached the fires. Grandfather ... Not my own but as close as if he were blood to me. He wanted to know why everyone was gathered around Cana's fires .. where was Cana? I felt clammy fingers grasp at my heart. Did he not know? No one had told him that the mother of his great grandson was in a coma??

Ayguili began to speak man to man with him ... Cana had fallen ill. There was the staunch posture of a man struggling with both the intense desire to be the protector and the overwhelming shock and pain that he could not be. What kind of illness? She does not wake, was what I offered him in quiet tones. He wanted to know immediately who had been chosen to free her from this? Ayguili stated it was Fonce, without adding much filler for how or why or what was being done. All Kam knew was what we had just said .. she was no longer among us consciously, only her body remained. You could see the pain in his eyes as he asked more quietly ... "quick and quietly with a quiva?" Everything in Ayguili tensed there and he shot back "No". But he added as well that she responded to nothing. Kam asked why .. why then let her suffer? The Ubar flashed back that as long as there was hope, we would not put her down like some worn out beast.

I could see Kam's surprise at such a statement and he clarified .. "You mistake my words."

"Then explain it to me"

The elder proceeded to ask what was the most important thing among our people to which the scarrer answered ... the bosk, the sky, life and all too quickly .. "she still has life in there somewhere". This no longer seemed about Cana but something eating at the Ubar where the Commander of the Ubar's guard was concerned. Kam reminded him that we hold courage and dignity sacred as well. Those are the values of the old ways. The ones I grew up with and hold so dear, along with honor.

He is a precise man, Kam is, one that wants to know details, complete information and he wanted it now. Was it a surity that life was still inside the woman lying inside the wagon motionless .. unwaking? We had hope, a unisoned remark that came from Ayguili and I at the same time. Tarra had believed that Cana was inside somewhere, we just had to find her. I felt it as well as sure as if I heard the woman's voice ring from the sky to tell me so.

Kam was reaasured but he still looked to Ayguili for the last degree of expectation. Was it not much the same as what the healer had said only half ahn before? If .. if .. things come out differently, leave her dignity intact. Do this for him, do this for her. Was it not better to ride the sky in all of its glory among those that have earned such rites of passage than to live .. like .. that?

Ayguiil nodded. "I agree. If that time comes, I will do it myself."

Kamchak clasped his arm and sounded a hand against the Ubar's back .. two warrior's understanding .. a promise .. a vow accepted.